This is an open letter to the band I’ve been following for *GASP* 7 years now. I wish things were the same as they were at the beginning. The excitement of the new. The excitement of the unknown. The excitement of waiting for front row. The excitement of waiting after to see if you’d come off the bus & say hello, take pics & be goofy.
I’ll never forget the first time you remembered my name. Like, how sweet was that? I never imagined my favorite band would know me, my name or even remotely care about my life. We were hanging out at a bar, on a random Thursday night, when this happened. Why can’t it be like this still?
I’ll never forget traveling and taking so many road trips on end to see you play a random college show with some of my best friends. The great feeling of hearing you call out “where are my Ohio girls at?” Why can’t it be like this still?
I’ll never forget you making us fans feel so special and loved for being as crazy as we were. But we were always there, always down & 100% supportive. Why can’t it be like this still?
We’ve grown together & grown apart. I always knew this time would come where it wouldn’t be the same as it was before but why has it come to this? It’s not over for you but it feels as if it’s over for me. I am at a constant battle with myself if I should continue to support or if I should walk away. But how can you walk away from something that has been a huge part of your life for that long? It’s just not that easy.
When you think you know someone, their values, their beliefs from following them all this time to feel like it’s been ripped from you from just one tweet. I don’t know what to believe anymore. My heart is so torn. So broken. So confused.
I want answers but is it really any of my business? No. Do I feel I am owed an explanation? Maybe. But ultimately, I don’t know you to your core and you don’t know me to my core. You really don’t owe me anything, which is the most heartbreaking part.
I don’t want this to be the end, but, my heart and my head are at a constant battle & it may be time to let things go. It was fun while it lasted. Thank you for the memories, laughs, friends made, road trips, amazing songs, amazing shows, tons of selfies & genuine love you showed me for supporting you for so long.
This may be the ultimate “post concert depression” I’ve ever, ever felt…